Trader Joe's Shredded Bite Size Wheats (Original + Frosted Maple & Brown Sugar)

Shredded wheat is about as exciting as laundry. Or going to work. Is it Friday yet? Fortunately for me, YES TODAY IS FRIDAY BECAUSE I'M OFF TOMORROW. Happy Monday to everyone else. :)

Anyhoo, I found myself in a cereal mood not too long ago and picked this up because it's out of the box. My usual cereal box that is. Not the worse pun I've heard, but pretty bad. It's Friday y'all. Hear me roar. 

I never had shredded wheat growing up. We were more of a Cheerios, Chex, and Quaker Squares kind of family. I never understood the appeal. The little factoid about wheat being one of the "five sacred grains" (while I don't know what the other four are, A would most likely say, "Rice, rice, rice, and rice.") is a bit random, but perhaps they are driving home that shredded wheat is a nearly sacred American breakfast staple. *shrug*

Y'all know that I regularly get in touch with my inner grandma and that the ageless importance of bowel motility comes up every now and then, but the original was a little TOO grandma for me. Of course I had braced myself for a sugarless cereal, but the original was completely tasteless. Not to mention, the cereal became soggy on contact (with milk) and sunk to the bottom of the bowl. I like cereal that floats. And if it sinks, it better taste good. This tasted like...nothing. Cardboard maybe. I topped it with cinnamon and raisins to no avail. Back to the store this went. 

And I traded the original in for this baby. This does come in a regular frosted variety, but I thought this might suit me better. Brown sugar and maple. Okay..promising. 

So yes the extra sugar here made it a bit more palatable. Has a nice brown sugary smell but isn't overly sweet.

Is the culprit here the whole wheat? Are all shredded wheat cereals made from whole wheat? Do they all taste like this? 

I just don't like the texture. Good cereals you can eat dry without milk. This makes me feel like I'm eating a bird's nest. It is after all little wheat sticks smashed together into a sham of a biscuit. And once it hits milk, this turns into a soggy bird's nest. Ugh. Although this brown sugar one is more palatable than the original, I'm just not excited about it. It's been sitting atop my fridge that it's gone stale. Yes, I could return it and get my $2.69 or whatever it is back. Or I could grind it up and feed it to the birds. 

TL;DR: Trader Joe's Shredded Bite Size Wheats. For now it wins the title of worst Trader Joe's cereal. 1 out of 10. 

TL;DR: Trader Joe's Frosted Maple & Brown Sugar Shredded Bite Size Wheats. You probably need the sugar for this one. 4 out of 10.